Changes
So I hate change. Apparently so does Rylee. We both have more than we can handle right now in that department. I sent out an email recently to loved ones titled "When it rains, it pours" and boy is it pouring.
For starters, we have someone "stalking" the neighborhood lately and that has us on high alert and a little stressed out. Manny became infested with ticks last weekend. Shawn never opened our Red Sox tickets so the game we thought we were looking forward to attending was actually the day BEFORE he opened the tickets. 4 weekend tickets wasted - and the only game I was going to be able to go to. And, oh, did I mention that Rylee still gets up at 11, 1, 3, 5, 6 and 7 am to nurse? I am truly mentally and physically exhausted in every sense of the word.
Last week I got laid off from work. Now I haven't mentioned much about my job on here because like I've said before - I truly believe in jinxing. Until now I've had a job where I can take Rylee to work with me. Having her with me has been the best thing I could imagine other than being able to stay at home with her. I'm now scrambling to find a new job (and did I mention how busy AND exhausted I was even before this?) AND daycare for Rylee. This would all seem a cake walk if it wasn't for the fact that my CHILD REFUSES TO TAKE A BOTTLE. AT ALL. EVER. I am at my witt's end trying. I am so beyond stressed out about it that I don't know what to do. I have tried EVERYTHING there is to try - I've tried every nipple, every bottle, having someone else feed her, having her fed while I'm in the room, having her fed while i'm out of the room, "tricking" her by breastfeeding her and then switching, putting water in the bottle, breastmilk in the bottle, formula in the bottle. Feeding her when she's starving, feeding her when she's not. Nothing works. Today the pediatrician told me that it wasn't going to do any good for me to keep trying - that she would continue to refuse the bottle from me. You just don't understand the extent to which she throws a tantrum. She kicks her legs, pushes me away and screams until she is hoarse and throwing up. Today I thought her head (and mine) might simply explode from crying so much and so hard. How am I supposed to put her in daycare without a way for them to feed her? I am certain that just before they call me and tell me not to bring her back, they will end up beating her senseless because she's been crying for 3 hours straight. She doesn't cry herself to sleep, she doesn't give in and eat, she doesn't allow herself to be soothed - those are all things she needs the breast for - she just screams and screams and screams. This is definitely the most miserable and stressed out I have ever been. I just don't know what to do.
On a brighter note, I did get a beautiful bouquet of two dozen roses from my father-in-law with the sweetest, most wonderful note attached to celebrate my first Mother's Day. It was such a nice surprise!
So if any of you have any tips on getting a stubborn baby to take a bottle, please help. I'm running out of options. And time.
posted by Jaime @ 9:03 PM
16 comments
16 Comments:
Jaime, sorry to hear you are having such a hard time. Rhyan was the same way! Eventually she gave in...all the doctor said to me was "she won't starve herself!" Gee thanks, that really helps! It is hard I know, but trust me when I say that it gets easier! As for daycare...I wouldn't mind watching the little bambino a few days a week or something. Please let me know if I can help in any way! I will do what I can for ya! Hang in there!
I hope that this all works out. I am sorry about Mother's Day. I love you...and if there is anything I can do..let me know. This summer I'll watch Rylee on Fridays?
Glad you got a little "sunshine" on Mother's Day! Ethan was a horrible baby, I feel bad sayint that but, I don't know how I survived the first 8 months of his life. Things will get better, I promise. In 6 months or so I am sure you will be able to look back and wonder how you did get through it.
There are theses bottles I used with Ethan, the nipple has numerous holes just like the breast. I ended up giving them to a freind who's son was one who wouldn't drink from bottle, he did like them. I can't remember the name, they were brand new about 1 1/2 years ago, I will call myfriend to find out the name! and let you know.
Second Nature, Jamie! Worth a try maybe??
Wow... your blog stressed me out just reading it...
Do they know why she wont sleep at night? that sounds unusual to me. How old is she? shes atleast 3 months right? Is she napping a lot during the day?...
Caleb when we brought him home from the hospital napped all day long... so he was doing the same thing... once I got him scheduled though and didnt let him nap but a few hours a day... he did awesome. 12 hours thru the night in a matter of days.
My advice. Its okay to let them cry some... I didnt rock Caleb as a newborn much at all. I'd lay him down and let him go to bed on his own... and you know ever since I did this he has been the best sleeping baby ever... but there were nights he'd cry because he wanted out... or wanted to be rocked. I'd rock him a few times... but never enough to put him completely asleep...
Its worked really well for us.
The bottle thing is puzzling. Ive never heard of one refusing to take a bottle. I have heard of them refusing the breast... but not bottle. Weird...
Any way... I hope it gets better... Makes it hard to enjoy things when its so stressful.
http://www.onestepahead.com/
product/85207/686/117.html
Have you tried this bottle?
Ang, thanks for the kind words and long-distance prayers. I wish we lived closer together, too!
Mel - I'll definitely keep that in mind. I'm applying for a job in your town today!
Amy - thanks for the offer. Maybe that will end up working out.
Donna - I'm willing to try ANYTHING so thanks for the tip! I'll be getting some asap.
Drea - Too funny - I just placed an order for those this morning. They can't come fast enough!!
Good luck Jaime and hang in there it will all work out. Is there anyway that you can stay home during the day and work part time at nights or on the weekend and cut the daycare cost and all out. So your shifts would be shorter and you could not stress so much about Rylee not eating for 9 some hours,etc!
HUGS and I am here if you want to talk!
oh jaime, i feel so bad for you. i do agree with donna that things will get better. keep reminding yourself that during this tough time. IT REALLY WILL!! one kind of bottle that i was given to try that worked well was "the first years" and it was a blue hard nipple inside a soft clear nipple, to resemble breastfeeding. also the best book ever on sleeping through the nite is "babywise" - i may have told u about it, but it is very very helpful. getting iz on the schedule reccommended in that book was not easy at first, but eventually it took. and it was so worth it to get some rest. i remember the first time i slept more than 3 hours in a row. i was in heaven. anyways, speaking of heaven :), i am praying for you. and that's really my best advice. take a few minutes when rylee is sleeping to pray over her, that she would begin taking the bottle and sleeping. i'm also praying for your job situation. wish i lived closer!!!
Jaime, I hope you get this in time, the Second Nature nipples fit the Avent bottles (the bottles themselves are identicle, might save some money if you just try the nipple!)
I'm sooo glad you have this blog. How else would you get advice or hear from people who have experienced what you are experiencing....This website is good for you!! no matter what ANYONE says :)
Love you
Wow..same thing with my oldest and same scenario as Angela. One day, Joe just took the bottle and that was that.
Hopefully that sweet little thing will start sleeping a bit better for you, too. Maybe try to let her cry a little (I know it is so hard!!!), but keep trying to push the 1 feeding closer to the 3 feeding. How long does she nurse each time? I always tried to adhere to the 20 minute rule. If my kids were screaming, I knew they were ok and not absolutely starving, I'd let them go for 20 min. Go check and soothe them a bit, and leave the room again.
And don't feel bad, ALL of my kids were horrible sleepers. And please try to suppress the urge to wring the neck of the women who will just LOVE to tell you how their newborns slept through the night from the first week on. Grrr!!
Hang in there!!
~L.
Jaime,
i was just thinkign the other day as we drove to dinner.
has your husband thought of working two jobs?...
so you can take care of the baby?..
I know it might be hard on him... sometimes its worth doing.
My husband worked two jobs when we 1st had Caleb.
So I wouldnt have to work.
I'm SO sorry! I don't have any tips for bottle feeding. I only know I read that it's confusing for a baby when the mother breastfeeds & bottle feeds. According to the book, it's best to let someone else bottlefeed. But I guess you already tried that.
Good luck on the jobhunt. I'm sure you'll find something soon.
I hope things get better soon hon'! Hugs to you & your family.
Oh I forgot .. about the napping.. I've read the book "Baby whisperer" and it has some great techniques. Including a schedule suitable for almost every baby. It's been great for us and Tim sleeps from 11 PM to 9 AM..
I'm sorry... It'll all work out in the end.
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